Let me be very clear: I love my job, but the culture of being busy and being “on” is dreadful. The distance between my work and my personal life has become increasingly smaller during the COVID-19 pandemic. The lines between home and work are blurred for me. I sometimes think that my work is no longer my calling and the past 10 years have been for naught.

One thing I started to do during the pandemic was read more. I read incessantly, and one book that I found helpful was “Set Boundaries, Find Peace: A Guide to Reclaiming Yourself,” by Nedra Glover Tawwab. In this book, Tawwab opens with the statement, “Boundaries will set you free.” This hit home immediately as I realized that my boundaries were becoming increasingly nonexistent in the workplace. Signs that I needed boundaries were:

• I felt overwhelmed.
• I felt resentment toward people for asking for my help.
• I felt burned out.
• I would frequently think about dropping all my responsibilities and disappearing.

These feelings were burdensome, and I needed to figure out how to liberate myself. One chapter, titled “Work,” in the aforementioned book, opens with, “People treat you according to your boundaries.”

I realized that without setting clear and concise boundaries in my work environment, I was losing my footing as a leader and culture co-creator. I thought that the only way to achieve some sort of balance was to pursue other opportunities. Before I would abandon my incredibly fulfilling profession, I asked myself a few critical questions:

• Have I tried setting any boundaries?
• In what ways do I contribute to this situation?
• What can I do to make this situation healthier?

First, have I tried to set boundaries? No. While I absolutely love connecting with my colleagues and spending time with them either in person or via Zoom, the Zoom platform was wearing me out. Everything became a Zoom meeting. Concerns that should have been an email, became a 15-minute Zoom meeting that would turn into a day of back-to-back Zoom meetings with little to no breaks.

One of the first things I realized is that I needed breaks in between Zoom meetings, just as I needed breaks in the pre-pandemic world. I also encouraged meetings via phone or email. Setting the boundary of having at least 15 minutes between Zoom meetings has helped with my mental and physical health. Sitting on Zoom for six to eight hours straight without breaks was also not good for my productivity.

Second, how had I contributed to the situation? I contributed by complying with the new norm of not taking a moment to think about my own needs. Because I neglected my own needs, I began to have the same expectation of my colleagues and those who were part of my organization. I had neglected to model limit-setting by complying with the new cultural norm of video conferencing for every detail of our work together. It was harmful to the positive climate I wanted to achieve. Therefore, I began to ask my staff if they wanted to meet via phone or email, or not at all. I thought about why we met and that positively affected how we met.

Lastly, what could I do to make the situation better? I explicitly ask members of my team to limit meetings and to take breaks between them. I incorporated mindfulness in my work day. I take a break from screens and reset by grounding myself at least once each day. My leader behavior of stepping away from the computer and engaging internally with myself has paid dividends in my work environment. We should not meet just to meet; we should be purposeful and engaged when we meet.

While the pandemic crystallized both how I worked and how much I worked, these issues were present pre-pandemic. I often went from meeting to meeting and never took a breath during the workday to think and do the work the meetings required. This was a detriment to my mental health and staff engagement.

Setting boundaries of limiting video meetings and rediscovering the purpose behind meeting shifted not only the ways in which I work, but also the ways in which those around me work.

We are building a new normal together, and for that I am grateful.